Aliens in This World

An ordinary Catholic and a science fiction and fantasy fan.

Saturday, January 03, 2004

Adventures in Songwriting



I'm dedicating this one to Jeff Miller, who cheers me up. Of course, if he'd written this, it would be a bit better....




With a Little Bitty Kid
Lyrics: Maureen S. O'Brien, 1/3/04
Music: "With a Little Bit of Luck", My Fair Lady

The nicest people wouldn't kill a crim'nal.
They wouldn't give a terrorist the chair.
The nicest people wouldn't kill a crim'nal, BUT
But with a little bitty kid,
With a little bitty kid,
For death sentences they just don't care!

CH 1:
With a little bit,
With a little bit,
With a little bitty kid, they just don't care!
With a little bit,
With a little bit,
With a little bitty unborn kid!

A mom can get a lot of help and choices.
So why's she think there's nothing else to do?
A mom can get a lot of help and choices, BUT
But with a little bitty kid,
With a little bitty kid,
Folks she loves say, "Kill it or you're through!"

CH2: (as above, except)
With a little bitty kid, they say she's through!

A woman has a right to her own body,
And what goes in her body she can choose.
A woman has a right to her own body, BUT
But with a little bitty kid,
With a little bitty kid,
She is just a thing for labs to use!

CH3: (as above, but)
With a little bitty kid, a thing to use!

BRIDGE:
Go protest war and meat and furcoats --
But if she ain't born yet, don't be upset!

There's bad genetics and then there's miscarriage;
Disease and injury are always near.
There's bad genetics and then there's miscarriage, BUT
But with a little bitty kid,
With a little bitty kid,
Mom and Dad must be a kid's worst fear!

(optional sf verse)
Some people wonder how to breed a teela*,
So lucky there's no danger she can't scorn.
Some people wonder how to breed a teela, BUT
But with a little bitty kid,
With a little bitty kid,
She'll need plenty luck to just get born!



*teelas: Larry Niven's novel Ringworld included a character named Teela Brown who was extremely lucky; Niven justified her existence by theorizing that the human race could be seen as inadvertently breeding for luck. These genetically lucky people he called teelas. Later, he wrote a short story set in a future so full of high-tech safety devices and lucky teelas that nothing story-worthy ever happened again.

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